”You will never be alone if you like the person you are with”
Entry Two. 11/21/2018
I find my self in a cute little vegan cafe/ yoga studio, tucked away on a street corner near my hostel in Chiang Mai. It’s such a strange and soothing feeling when I grasp the fact that this is my life. I can leisurely enjoy my chai masala pancakes after finishing up my work & practicing some yoga, then go on with my day; enjoying all of the excitement this foreign city has to offer. It feels so surreal.
My last day in Bangkok was extremely long. I was too exhausted from the jet-lag and excursions from the days prior, for me to venture off too much into the unknown. So, when I had finally gotten up to pack, do a quick yoga sesh and leave, I just sat in the hostel restaurant for hours. Working, people watching, eating, and blogging. Every now and again other travelers would stop by and chat with me. Many of whom, dropped everything to wander the many cities of the world or were being paid to enjoy their thrilling adventures. It made me feel so much more sure of myself. As if every single one of these wanderlust explorers were reassurance that this is exactly where I should be.
My journey to Chiang Mai had me in a glossed over, exhausted, daze. When I had finally arrived, I strangely found myself a little disappointed that I had not been in a rowdy, party-centered hostel. I had somehow managed to find peace within the chaos and excitement of everything. Which is weird for me, as I have never been a much of a “partier” and I practically fall asleep at the sound of loud booming music in clubs and bars. But, I had found myself opening up to the wild and free-spirited travelers more than I ever have before.
At the hostel in Chiang Mai, I thought perhaps it would be more difficult to meet great people since at party hostels people tend to be extremely outgoing and full of life. I thought striking up conversations and finding friends to go out with would be slightly more of a challenge, since everyone here seemed so quiet and to themselves. So, it did require me to put myself out there more. But truthfully, this was probably a blessing in disguise. What better way to learn to be more of a conversationist than to… ya know, converse.
It was mostly a lot of “where are you from’s” “what do you do for work” “how long are you here for” “oh wow you work online, where can I find something like that”, which definitely gave a little breathing room to have a flowing interaction. Especially if you aren’t used to going out of your way to talk to new people. I did end up making some really great friends once again. It was nice to have someone around to take cool travel photos with and exploring the city more than I would have felt comfortable doing, on my own.
Sometimes, I found myself so conflicted. Always fighting the urge to go back into my personal bubble to recharge for a few days. But then, every time someone new walked by, I felt as if it were a missed opportunity. Like I couldn’t just sit here away from everyone else, even for a minute. Too many times I found myself being inconsistent with my desire to be around people when they were actually there. I just wanted to go back to my bed and relax. Talk about confusion.
The thing is, is that I’ve been teaching myself to say “yes” more, and maybe I just happen to be in a little bit of resistance with being consistent and opening up. Although recharging my energy is absolutely necessary, I’ve grown way too attached to retreating to my own space; sometimes, I just need to break the cycle and get out of my comfort zone, and become a little more vulnerable.
Loi Krathong & Yi Peng 11/22/18
My trip to Chiang Mai happened to fall on the most magical set of days. Thailands lantern festival. It has the most beautiful meaning, releasing old energies to send out new desires and blessings; allowing your gratitude for all of the amazing things you are attracting, to flow freely into the universe.
The river was consumed with people letting go of their anger and hatred through a strand of their hair or a nail, and in turn, placing coins into their krathong for prosperity, to release into the rivers. Hopes for love, abundance, happiness, and success soaked up every bit of negative energy.
The sky was lit up with beautiful, white lanterns, paying respects to Buddha, and representing peace and purity.
I can’t even begin to describe the beauty of this festival, and when you add pure connections with amazing people to the mix, it was completely magical. I was mesmerized by the energy that radiated within me the night we all released our self-doubting, limiting beliefs that we felt were holding us back from achieving greatness. In turn, it allowed us to attract the love and abundance we deserve.
*watch video of the festival here*
The festival lasted about 3 days, but celebrations went on for about a week or so. After that, everyone cleared out of Chiang Mai. I had my entire 4-bed hostel completely to myself. One of my friends from the hostel and I had just been lounging around forever, trying to figure out what to do in a city where just days (even hours) before was filled with so much life.
We ate a lot, slept a lot, watched movies, and that was as far as the thrill went. Maybe it was just that we were in the city for such an awkward length of time Not long enough to really immerse in the community, but not short enough to do everything without having a moment to even think about what we’d do next.
All in all, it was interesting to see both spectrums of the city. Both through the chaos and the deafening silence. Moving on to my next location Koh Phangan, I have lots of island life stories to share already– but not before my review and experience of the Maerim Elephant Sanctuary. Watch my new Travel Diary video for all of the fun and yummy things I got up to in Chiang Mai!